Chicago Bears: These quarterbacks have made us who we are

(Photo by Jonathan Daniel/Getty Images)
(Photo by Jonathan Daniel/Getty Images) /
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Mitch Trubisky Chicago Bears
Chicago Bears (Photo by Jennifer Stewart/Getty Images) /

There’s a reason Chicago Bears fans get unreasonable about their quarterbacks. Going back through them it’s a wonder we survived.

I despise myself and can’t believe I am here, in this position, with all of you, my fellow Chicago Bears fans.

That’s the only explanation I can have for doing this. I know everyone outside of greater Bears-dom hates the way Bears fans are about their quarterbacks. Heck, Bears fans hate the way we are about quarterbacks. But we didn’t get this way on purpose.

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Put it this way, if you’ve been eating carnival corn dogs for decades, and then suddenly you had hope of a real meal, you’d probably be obnoxiously hopeful about it, wouldn’t you? Also strangely, the rate of survival between eating nothing but carnival corndogs or watching Bears quarterbacks for 20 years is almost exactly the same.

And the corndogs had a better arm than half of these guys we’re going to discuss.

Let’s get this out of the way first: Mitch Trubisky is not going to succeed or fail because of what went on with everyone before him.

This is not a “DA BEARS CAN NEVER HAVE A GOOD QB CUZ CUTMAN WAS A JERK AND DEY SHOULDA GIVEN PETER TOM WILLIS A LONGER LOOK!” post.

Whatever Trubisky does this year and beyond will be because of him and him alone. There is no fog that turns quarterbacks inside out lingering over Chicago (we just smell that way).

But in order to understand what Trubisky is up against in our minds, I decided to go back through all the Bears quarterbacks of my lifetime. I’m telling you now, this won’t be fun. It’ll be straight-up painful, and not in a $300-an-hour way. But we will learn and understand. I have to warn you to not do this all in one sitting, for fear of what your intestines might turn into. I’m looking out for you here.

Let’s do this.